As a leader, are you having regular one-on-one meetings with your
staff and direct reports? These are regularly scheduled meetings with
each and every one of your direct reports where you sit down and talk.
One-on-one meetings are an opportunity for the leader to LEAD.
It
is your opportunity to inspire, influence, motivate, coach, listen,
solve problems, make decisions, and create an environment where
employees feel energized and accountable. You can’t do this with email.
If you lead and manage a team remotely, attempt to have face-to-face
monthly or quarterly meeting as you conduct the majority of your
conversations over the phone. Skype is a terrific resource for this
interaction. As a leader, it is critical for you to be able to have
open and honest conversations with your staff about their jobs, their
performance, conflicts and development opportunities.
It is
amazing how many leaders don’t schedule these one-on-one meetings. Even
for those that do, they frequently cancel them due to other pressing
issues. By doing so, what are you demonstrating to your employees? Think
about this question and let it sink in. What comes to mind?
~ Your pressing issues are more important?
~ Your job is more important?
~ You have not taken time to prepare?
~ You don’t understand their value or how to structure them properly?
~
You don’t enjoy talking face to face with your employees because it is
uncomfortable to address challenging issues, to listen without judgment
and discuss developmental opportunities.
~ Courageous conversations are too difficult? Really?
If
these or others come to mind, maybe you go back to being an individual
contributor because leadership is about inspiring, influencing and
developing your staff. Surely one-on-one meetings take time and
sometimes, very pressing company or client issues come up that may
require a reschedule. However, those situations should be few and far
between.
Why do some leaders fail to schedule regular
one-on-one meetings or don’t commit to those that are scheduled? Here
are some practical tips in having effective one-on-one meetings with
your team.
#1. Have scheduled one-on-one meetings and never miss them.
Consistently
schedule one-on-one meetings for the same time each week. This develops
the habit for you and your direct reports. Set an agenda and be
flexible about what each of your direct reports wants and needs from you
during this meeting. Remember this meeting is to help both of you. In
today’s high-pressure environment the success of your team depends on
the individuals in your team being successful. The purpose of a
one-on-one meeting is to provide your direct report with the information
to do his/her job and about providing you with the information you need
to help him/her do his job.
#2. Create a safe environment.
One-on-one
meetings should be primarily about accurate status for the
leader/manager, and continuous improvement for the employee. In order to
get the maximum benefit from the one-on-one meeting you must create a
non-threatening meeting environment.
Provide constructive
feedback/coaching on how to prevent issues from recurring as well as
what they are doing well. Accountability and responsibility are keys.
Don’t play the blame game as it will only close down your direct reports
and you won’t get the information you need.
#3. Eliminate all interruptions.
This is your
time with your direct report. Turn off your phone, android, Blackberry
or put it on vibrate and place it in your pocket and ignore it. Move the
computer screen away and forward your phone. As the leader you want to
get maximum productivity out of your one-on-one meetings. It is your
responsibility to make your direct report feel like for a specified
period of time they have your undivided attention. This means absolutely
no interruptions. I prefer meeting in a neutral location, like a
conference room.
#4. How to schedule your one-on-one meetings.
When
should you schedule your one-on-one meetings? A good suggestion is that
these meetings should be one half hour, once a week. The best answer is
whenever fits best in your schedule and the schedule of your direct
reports. Personally, I have always preferred to have my one-on-one
meetings on Monday or early in the week. The reason I liked Monday’s is
because it gave me lots of time to work on and resolve any action items
they came up that were my responsibility and it’s the start of the week.
#5. How best to prepare.
Your preparation for a
one-on-one meeting should begin the second that the previous meeting
for your direct report ends. You may want to keep a computer file or
personal folder for each direct report and whenever you think of
something you need to talk to them about in the next meeting, make a
note in the folder.
Create an agenda for your one-on-one
meetings and make sure your directs have input on the format and items
to discuss. Remember both you and your employees should clearly
articulate your expectations for these meetings. A suggested format may
include the following categories:
Accomplishments and status
– a list of current projects, or sales with one or two sentences
describing progress and status on each. Identify what roadblocks are
preventing the projects and sales from moving forward.
To do – a high-level to-do list of what you would like to accomplish in the next week.
Areas to develop – areas of development and what activities you have undertaken to develop in those areas.
Quarterly goal tracking
– Whether you establish goals monthly, quarterly or yearly, you and
your direct reports should be making steady progress toward fulfilling
those goals.
#6. What should the format look like?
Time is
precious so use it effectively. All you need is 30 minutes for these
update meetings. Therefore you can divide the meetings into thirds.
One-third for your direct report to discuss their stuff on the agenda;
one-third for you to pass on information that you think may be of value
to your direct report, discuss items of special interest to you and
delegate new work; and one-third for assisting the employee with
development opportunities. Remember these are guidelines only.
#7. What questions do you have and what questions do you want them to ask you?
It
depends on the issues you talk about. Use open-ended questions that
start with (What, Where, How) and then focus in the areas that are
important to you and your direct report. Some additional effective
questions include: What obstacles are getting in the way and what can I
do as the leader to remove the obstacles; what can you/we do differently
next time; what do you need from me; how are you going to approach
this; what areas are ahead of schedule; are you on track to meet your
deadlines or quota; what will you do differently and what do you think?
Questions you may want your employees to ask you include: What do I
need to do to continue to demonstrate my commitment to you as your
leader/manager; what should I stop doing that may be getting in the way;
what more can I do to support you?
Remember asking questions
are extremely important. So is listening to the answers. Don’t interrupt
and use your active listening skills to really understand where your
employees are coming from.
#8. Your meeting wrap up.
At the end of the
meeting be sure that the actions from the meeting are recorded, and
review the actions with the direct report so the actions are clearly
understood. Ask the direct report if there is anything else they would
like to discuss. Finally, show your sincere appreciation and thank them
for their time and commitment to the process.
#9. Post-meeting action.
For
any meeting to be highly successful what you do after the meeting is as
important as the meeting itself. Using whatever method you do to track
your work; the actions you are responsible for need to be worked on. One
of the quickest ways to erode the effectiveness of your one-on-one
meetings, and most likely your relationship with your direct reports is
to agree to actions on behalf of your direct reports and not follow up
on them.
As a leader, it is imperative to have regularly
scheduled one-on-one meetings with your direct reports. It is important
for their development, your development, and will help to increase
everyone’s engagement, and commitment to vision, goals and overall
strategies.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. Now, what
is your first step in committing to and hold powerful one on one
meetings? We would love to hear from you with comments or questions. Send me a note via email at brad@aperiocoaching.net or on Twitter @bparcells.
Leadership is about authenticity. Who you are is how you lead! Let me
say that again, who you are is how you lead. I have reading a terrific
little book, If You Know You Are, You Will Know What To Do,
by Ronald Greer. This powerful book is about living with integrity.
Ronald says that out of integrity one is defined and makes the choices
that become their life. It's about doing the right thing when you know
it's the right thing to do. It's who you are. It's being true to the
lives to which you have been called. It's who you are when someone's
watching and when there is no one around.
Integrity is both
personal and moral. Personal integrity is when you are authentically
the person you were created to be. It means living a life of wholeness,
congruence and without regret. Moral integrity is when you do what is
right simply because you know it is the right thing to do. It means
living a life of character and virtue. Integrity takes both.
Leadership takes both. Authenticity and integrity go hand in hand.
Like
all of us, I have seen leaders crumble by the facades they present. I
too have fallen and experienced succumbing to this condition. When the
pressure is on, the "real person" comes out. I am now exposed and
afraid that the sham has been revealed. What's next, guilt and shame.
And I have found myself revert back to type, only when I had not taken
my previous errors, learned from them and then modified my behaviors.
In other words I did not learn from my experience. I had not learned a
better way. I put up a facade to let others believe that I have.... but
as they say, facades crumble.
There is some truth in this facade condition in all of us. It may not
be all the time and only under certain circumstances. Ask yourself
how's that working out for you? We can keep convincing ourselves that
the facade is working and that no one will find out. But you know it's
there, so what's stopping you! Fear of exposure? Where is the
authenticity in that? Where is our integrity in that? If you are able
and willing to look at yourself honestly and openly, changing your focus
and behaviors will be an amazingly sobering and liberating experience.
Not putting the effort into knowing who you are stalls many leadership
careers and personal lives. Pretending to be someone or something you
are not creates other issues. Trying to be everything to everyone is
another common flaw. Is it any wonder Authentic Leadership is a trending
topic around the world today.
Authentic leadership starts with integrity. Integrity comes from the Latin integer,
meaning whole, integrated, complete. It is where your beliefs,
convictions, thoughts and behaviors are integrated together in your
life. It involves your values. A person of integrity intentionally
follows a moral or ethical code. A major element in anyone's
completeness as a person is following the set of values in which you
believe and by which you strive to live.
Authentic leadership also starts with Self-Awareness. Self-aware
leaders go to great lengths to learn from their mistakes and errors.
They understand their strengths, their weaknesses and impacts on others.
They take the lessons. They learn to maximize their strengths and work
on their weaknesses. And the importance of knowing your impact on others
can never be underestimated.
A leader I knew during my career
could never get away from being called "Mr. B". No matter how hard he
tried he could never step away from the formal name from the people he
led. He was a tall man and quite stern looking, so he intimidated people
without trying. He realized he needed to break away from what he saw as
his "professorial" formality. He went to great pains to connect with
people at their level. He moved away from the constant work and task
communication and connected with what they valued and treasured, and
slowly the formal name started to ease. He started to connect better
with his team and because of this he started seeing a better team. He
saw greater initiative and constant improvements. The formal approach
and perception of intimidation had curtailed his team engagement, and
when he worked to connect with his team at their level, the results
multiplied.
Now he created a better leadership and team environment by having the
self-awareness to understand the reasons behind the formal approach,
and the desire to change it to create a better environment. Many leaders
I have known and worked for would not have the self-awareness and some
would welcome the perception as it created fear and intimidation as the
major influencing aspect.
Self Awareness Leads to Insight
Self-Aware
leaders should ask themselves the following questions if they want to
maximize their leadership skills and effectiveness.
- What drives me? What is my purpose?
- How am I currently feeling?
- What is my mindset and how is that affecting my attitude to others?
- How am I impacting others?
- How are others around me feeling and reacting?
Self-aware people create time daily to reflect and analyze. Many
of my clients have a process to reflect daily. They include things
like:
- A daily walk alone with your thoughts
- A routine time and place to stop and think, e.g. A bench overlooking
a special view, a particular chair in their office/home, a long walk
with your dog, a great yoga session.
- Some meditate.
- Some even lie down and still their mind to reflect.
People should have a regular process to pause and reflect, because
this is the key to becoming self-aware. Reflection leads to
self-awareness and self-awareness is one of the first steps in becoming
an authentic leader.
If you really want to improve your results,
ask yourself. Who are you? What is your purpose? What impact are you
having on others around you? How am I feeling? How is my team feeling?
Thank
you for taking the time to read this. How would you begin to break
through your thoughts, emotions and actions to becoming a more self
aware leader? We would love to hear from you with comments or questions. Send me a note via email at brad@aperiocoaching.net or on Twitter @bparcells.
Making
the move from middle management to the executive suite requires a
healthy dose of confidence. Executives have to make critical,
wide-reaching decisions, often with limited information and time—then
persuade others to execute those decisions. Self-assurance is a must.
Yet
gaining confidence can be a struggle. The “Impostor Syndrome” is real:
researchers at Georgia State University found that 33% of the
high-achieving adults they interviewed did not feel they deserved their
success. The Imposter Syndrome meant that sufferers opted out of
important career opportunities, to their financial and personal
detriment.
The good news is that confidence can be learned, like
any career skill. Here are 10 steps that can have you operating from a
place of power:
1) When in doubt, act. It’s the
difference between running and stagnant water. When you’re stagnant,
doubt and insecurities breed like mosquitoes. Dale Carnegie wrote that
“inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage.”
Fear of failure can paralyze us, as we almost always overestimate the
consequences. Build your confidence instead by taking action, often.
2) Do something outside your comfort zone each day.
If we don’t stretch our comfort zones, they shrink. Constantly
challenge and improve yourself, and you’ll become comfortable doing new
things—and you will establish your identity (both to yourself and
others) as someone who takes risks. Each new thing you try adds to your
knowledge and skill base, and provides you with a foundation of
competence. This is the bedrock of any successful career.
3) Put the focus on others. Choose
to be conscious of others instead of self-conscious. Ask people
questions. Turn conversations into a game where you try to find a
connection with the other person. Give compliments generously, and
volunteer to help others when you can. Looking for the best in others
will help you see it in yourself.
4) Cultivate mentors. Their
advice and connections are invaluable, plus you will make better
decisions about opportunities thanks to their objective assessments of
the pros and cons. And you will be much more willing to take risks
knowing you have supporters who will help you get back up on your feet
if you fail.
5) Keep self-talk positive. It’s hard to feel confident if someone puts you down all the time. It’s impossible if that naysayer is you. Watch how you talk to yourself. Is it how you would talk to a friend? If not, then make a change.
6) Eliminate negative people from your network. You
absolutely need to invite and be receptive to constructive criticism if
you want to grow as a professional and as an individual. But recognize
that some people will never be happy with you or with life, and it is a
waste of time to try to convince them of your worth. What’s more, their sour outlook on life is contagious. Learn to identify these people quickly, and move on.
7) Take care of your health. Make time for exercise, and get enough rest. Your body must be physically ready to take on challenges.
8) Do your homework. Keep
up-to-date on the news in your industry, and know your company and
department inside and out. If you have a challenging task ahead, prepare
and practice in your mind. Nothing builds confidence like knowledge and
preparation.
9) Watch your body language. Your
posture and overall appearance affect both your mental state and how
others perceive (and thus respond) to you. If you want to be a leader,
you have to dress and act the part. Stand and sit up straight, make eye
contact, and remember to smile. Wear the professional clothing of your
industry. Eliminate the telltale signs of nervousness: excessive
twitching, closed-off posturing (crossed arms and legs, hunched
shoulders), and shallow breathing.
10) Practice gratitude daily. In
a recent study of how successful people spend the first hour of each
day, the No. 1 response was investing time in thinking about the things
for which they are most grateful. Starting your day by saying “thank
you” for the good in your life makes it more likely that you will
approach the day’s challenges with the proper perspective.
Like
public speaking or leadership, confidence is a professional skill that
can be improved. According to Dr. Peter Buckley of Georgia Regents
University, “As you add experiences, you’re more likely to gain
confidence. And with confidence, you will embrace new experiences.”
Start growing your confidence today.
Thank you for taking the time
to read this. How would you begin to break through your thoughts,
emotions and actions to becoming a more confident and better leader? We
would love to hear from you with comments or questions. Send me a note via email at brad@aperiocoaching.net or on Twitter @bparcells.
A lot of people get trapped in the idea that they are nothing more
than ordinary. Many of us feel like our professions lack a big title or
we don’t have any direct reports so we see ourselves mostly as
followers. Nothing could be farther from the truth. We are all leaders
in our own ways.
I write a lot about leadership and work with
leaders each and every day. Leadership comes in many shapes and sizes,
its qualities are subtle and can be quite dramatic. Though this
certainly is not a complete list, here are twelve signs that show you're not
only a leader, but a remarkably good leader.
1. You lead when you are needed to. We've
all met assertive go-getters who feel the need to be in charge no
matter the task at hand. Whether it's a group project, following an
itinerary, or even just a brainstorming session, these people need to be
in charge and they will make sure everyone knows it. Always being in
charge, however, doesn't translate to good leadership. Good leaders know
their areas of expertise–they work for the good of the project and not
themselves. They know when to stand aside and hand over the baton.
2. You lead for a cause, not a promotion. While it's
important to have ambition, a remarkably good leader dedicates their
energies first to the cause, then to the team and lastly to him or
herself. Leadership often comes with power, but that's not its defining
characteristic. If you take on a project hoping to reap only
self-benefit, it will show in its outcome and be reflected on the morale
of your team.
3. You break the rules. Leadership
is about redefining things, finding new solutions and leading others to
bigger and better things. Remarkably good leaders don't stay in a
single place and carry out their activities outside the box. Leadership
is about bringing progress and provoking evolution, and none of this can
be done from inside the margins of the status quo.
4. You speak out. Do
you spot a double standard? Did you witness an injustice? Remarkably
good leaders speak up in the face of adversity and stand up for what is
right, not what is popular. Standing up for those who can't and taking a
stand to help others is an important characteristic of a leader.
5. You know your team.
Imagine taking the wheel on a project but having no idea of who you are
working with or what their strengths are. Now imagine working on a
project and having the person in charge never call you by name, or
worse, call you by the wrong name. Remarkably good leaders know
everything they need to know about each and every member of their team,
they are personable and always have their preferences in mind when
delegating duties.
6. You appoint the right people to the right position. What
good is it to know your team and their abilities if you don't take
advantage of them? Remarkably good leaders don't just know what their
team is about, they know how to best delegate their strengths and
weaknesses to get results.
7. You give credit where it's due. Once
a goal is reached, it's easy for others to place credit on the team
leader. Bad leaders reap in the spotlight and are ready to take credit
for the end results. Meanwhile, a remarkably good leader never fails to
highlight others' individual work. Using "we" when speaking of triumphs
goes a long way. True leaders know they are nothing without the people
around them and they are not afraid of showing it.
8. You are extremely accountable. Everybody
makes mistakes and remarkably good leaders are not an exception.
Failures more than successes separate the good from the bad, given that
the latter searches for someone to blame instead of taking
responsibility. Great leaders often speak of failures in terms of "I"
and take responsibility for their team. Remarkably good leaders are not
fazed by periods of failures - at least they have a good team to get
through it with.
9. You trust your intuition. When
leading a team into uncharted territory, remarkably good leaders trust
themselves to make sound decisions. They draw from past experiences or
ask for help from mentors or experienced members of their field. Fear of
the unknown doesn't hold them back because they believe in themselves
and their team.
10. Your positivity and energy are contagious. No
matter the situation, remarkably good leaders keep their spirits high.
They take failures gracefully and successes do not go to their heads.
They keep an appropriate sense of humor, show humility, and more than
team members, they have friends. Remarkable leaders generate enthusiasm
for the work they do, their positivity is contagious and it shows on the
quality of their team's job.
11. You are a terrific listener.
Remarkably good leaders don't want to rule their team, they want to
work together. This mans they are open to listening to new ideas or
projects and are not afraid of seeking advice and learning from others.
Most importantly, remarkably good leaders also listen to criticism and
don't become defensive or upset when a team member or client voices a
concern or points out an inconsistency or mistake.
12. You inspire others to change. Remarkably
good leaders know the difference between dictating and leading.
Dictating involves scaring team members into getting results. Leading
involves inspiring people to give the best they have to achieve said
results. Remarkably good leaders inspire their team members to become
the best version of themselves that they can be. They build solid
foundations, and are not afraid of sharing knowledge. If you are always
searching for ways to make the people around you grow, they will be
inspired to do so and their work will reflect how proud they are to be
part of your team.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. How
would you begin to break through your thoughts, emotions and actions to
becoming a better leader? We would love to hear from you with comments
or questions. Send me a note via email at brad@aperiocoaching.net or on Twitter @bparcells.
